45 Life Update
Today is my 45th Birthday and I’m thankful to be alive.
As I reflect upon the last 3 years when I was first diagnosed with Leukemia Blood Cancer, my mind started going back about 12 years prior when my neurologist found a Brain Tumor. Perhaps it’s because the events were a lot less impactful than what I have endured the last 3 years, but I don’t nearly talk about it as much. However, the memories are vividly clear as Rena and I returned from our Pastor’s house from a day of food and fellowship. That night I fell to a couple of seizures. Of course, I thought I has just fallen asleep in my chair. To my wife’s incredible intuition, something didn’t sound right coming from the Living Room and she came out of our bedroom to check on me and sure enough, I was having a seizure. So, there we were with Police, Fire, and Rescue in our house asking me to get into the ambulance an emergency run to the hospital. Again, thinking I had just fallen asleep was taken by the moment. Having to get away, I went back to our spare room where Rena met me and told me what happened. The next thing I knew, I was in the back of the ambulance headed to Baptist Hospital (now St. Thomas Midtown). I don’t remember the ride so much, because after I was put on the stretcher and placed inside, I remember waking up to a medical team surrounding my bed in the Emergency Room. Apparently, I had another seizure on the way.
Long story short, after a week in the hospital, it was determined that I had a tumor towards the back right-side of my brain. Surgery was scheduled the following week for a biopsy and possible removal depending on what they saw once they got in. Thankfully, they did find a brain! I showed for surgery. It lasted just under 2 hours, and I went home the next day. I believe that happened on a Monday. On Friday of that week, I got a call from my Neurologist saying that everything showed up as benign, BUT that he wanted me to get another MRI right away (that took place the following week). When I got to the imaging center, they gave me explicit instructions to immediately take the image results (on a CD) to my Neuro. About a half hour later, I am sitting in the waiting room of my Neurologist—after giving them the CD of course, and the nurse called me back where everyone was just kind of looking at me with anticipation as I made my way to the examination room. Moments later (which seemed like hours), my Neurologist came in and pulled up two MRI images. The first image was the one take two weeks prior showing the Brain Tumor. The second one was a CLEAN image of my brain from that morning. I’ll never forget the doctor’s words thereafter, “Mr. Puschmann, whatever was there is GONE. You don’t even have any scare tissue which you should have some because of the surgery that was performed. You can see the little divot where we took the biopsy, but other than that, your scan is CLEAN!” My Neurologist went on to say— without officially saying it, I was a “WALKING MIRACLE.” I looked at my doctor and proceeded to tell him that I do believe in the Greater Physician—Jesus, who is Lord of my life. Why this happened, I don’t know, but.
Fast-forward to today and I still feel the same way. I truly believe God heals through both medicine and miracle. Why He heals at all, I don’t pretend to understand. That’s His prerogative. I am not better than anyone else and I have made more than my fair-share of mistakes. Many things in life I regret or wish I would have navigated better. HOWEVER, the bottom-line is, I BLESS THE LORD for His grace, love, and mercy in my life. Our God is good— even in all of life’s pain and suffering. From the loss of my brother, Craig, at a young age, the brain tumor, and cancer, God has walked with me through it all and I am humbly grateful, and I love Him more today than ever before. I don’t pretend to have it all together or even half of the answers, but one thing I do know is that even through the fire, God is good. I don’t deserve Him and I am certainly not worthy, but because of His great love and mercy, He sent us His only Son, Jesus to die for me and make me worthy. I am worthy because Jesus is worthy. My righteousness are as filthy rags, but I claim the righteousness of Jesus my Savior who died and rose again for me AND FOR YOU! If you haven’t already, I implore you to put your faith and trust in Him TODAY!
On my 45th Birthday, I have a lot for which to be thankful. I have a loving and caring wife who has gone above and beyond her call of duty. I have 3 beautiful crazies (children) of whom I love so much more than words. I have a wonderful family—my parents, my brother, my in-laws, and all my extended family. Finally, I am blessed with the most incredible friends and loved ones (YOU) who have loved and supported me through every high and low.
If I may ask for one prayer, please continue to pray about my employment situation. I recently had three amazing interviews for a position I really hoped to get—one where I could encourage and pray with people in sort of a pastoral capacity—but it didn’t work out. That was tough. I’m okay though, and I trust something else will come along. Finances are tight, but so many of you have helped us (especially those who read my blog from March: https://pastorpusch.com/blog/help). Your kindness will never be forgotten. Words can’t express my gratitude, and we try to extend the same help to others whenever we can. YOU ARE LOVED MY DEAR FRIENDS!
So, Happy Birthday to me! I am truly blessed!
Love,
Eric
“Not to us, O Lord, not to us, but to Your name give glory, for the sake of Your steadfast love and Your faithfulness!” - Psalm 115:1
*By the way… I got to preach last Sunday and it felt so good to get to do what I love!
